Entry# 0

Dear Diary,

So it finally happened. I knew it would, after all these years of being loyal to Stan I just.. I just had to do it.

I missed it so much, man…

When I was younger I had so much wang that I had the world’s largest sex garden. Still do actually, but I haven’t added to it since I got married…

Now, I have a couple of kids, a crazy alien in the attic, and a talking fish… Ugggg I am a housewife. A boring, dull, still fabulously pretty housewife.

For 20 years I’ve been a good wife too… taken the same, boring, missionary position sex once a week and pretending to enjoy it… god I’m falling asleep even writing about it.

But now… now I”M BACK BABY! Wooooo!!!

After today’s adventure, I decided since I cannot add to my garden, I’ll just keep a diary. I’ll try to add something here every time I do something sexy without Stan. I dunno if it’s such a great idea, keeping a record but it helps make it real for me if I can have something to look back on.

Dunno, maybe I just hope someday Stan will find this and see that I am more than a housewife. I am a very, VERY sexual person.

I'd really love to hear about what you thought of my adventures this week!

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